• Olliviette

Summer Bae: 3 Ways To Have A Summer Fling With Yourself

Barbecues, refreshing cocktails, that cute yellow frock - it must be summer. This is the most elite season of the year but as much as I love me some sun, fetes and good food, it can be incredibly tiring. Namely, not having a summer bae.


Younger me would obsess over not having someone to attend events with or being alone during hot nights. I’d jokingly lament over how boring my life was when I wasn’t boo’d up like my friends come mid-June. Eventually, I started appreciating the freedom being single provided. Instead of obsessing over imaginary partners, I began embracing the idea of being my own summer bae.


It’s not a revolutionary concept, how many of us are in the “dating myself” stage, but it’s one that I’ve been doing at least three summers now. Even if you’re in a relationship with someone, there’s nothing wrong with having a fling with yourself. In my very humble opinion, you should always romance yourself.


Love comes and goes but self is forever. Hey Cardi.


I’m sharing three easy ways to give yourself the best summer loving ever; and who’s to say this solo fling can’t turn into something more permanent? There are days I feel so in love with myself that I don’t have eyes for anyone else lol!

Enough of these love songs to myself. Keep reading to learn how you can treat yourself like bae this summer.


Have a solo summer fling - be a social butterfly


The best part about having a summer bae is you always have someone to take with you to an event or hang out with.


You might ask, “how am I supposed to show up and show off if I’m solo?” The answer is you show up and show off - solo.


Go everywhere this summer, be that social butterfly who lights up the room. Wherever bae would take you, whatever you’d suggest you two try, that’s where you go and that’s what you do.


Don’t limit yourself simply because you don’t have someone on your arm. Apply your coconut oil (my basic version of Fenty’s Body Lava) and glow, aka slide, right on through your summer events.


Dating yourself during summer is all about learning how to put yourself out there; allowing the season to pass by just because you’re alone is so 90s. Plus, someone might see you out there living your best life and share their contact info..you never know!


Have a solo summer fling - invest in yourself


This might seem like weird advice, but hear me out. Use this summer to boost yourself up spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically.


I’m doing all of that this summer! Why? Because I plan to enjoy next summer with somebody’s child and I want to enjoy them as a better version of myself. Currently, I’m eating healthier (I’m trying, don’t come for me), learning new things, embracing things that will enrich my spirit, letting go of demons and looking into a skin routine...all this now for a better summer next year.


Trust me, if I had a bae this summer I’d def try to get them to invest in a lil something for me. Hook this sis up with a program/course, buy my fresh fruit, take me out for cuisine I’ve never tried before...investments. Don’t get mad at me if you’ve never thought about it, get mad at yourself and the game.


Some summer flings go deeper than just Netflix and chill; there are people who come into your life to help you grow. Have you ever been with someone who taught you to meditate, who oiled your scalp and whispered words of affirmation to you in the mornings?


No? Well, you’re about to! Look in the mirror - hey bae!


Have a solo summer fling - embrace intimacy


I couldn’t talk about having a summer fling with yourself without mentioning intimacy as that’s (usually) the foundation of this seasonal relationship.


Notice, I’m not talking about sex - yeah, sex is cool and all but intimacy encompasses that and more.


This summer go deeper with yourself.


Create a relaxing atmosphere, open up with yourself about the romantic things you enjoy, take time to experience yourself.


In the past, I hated anything romantic. I’ve shared a bit about my upbringing and how religion shaped my views on sexuality. The power of tuning into myself and allowing myself to feel like a sexual being has helped me shake those weird thoughts off.


During summer:


  • Walk around in your sexiest lingerie

  • Try new solo play techniques

  • Sip champagne as you journal your deepest desires

  • Give yourself time


Create an atmosphere where you thrive on your most sacred level and even if you end up dating someone this season, do not compromise learning more about yourself.

Are you ready to have a fling with yourself this summer? I hope my tips have you feeling excited and feeling yourself a bit more.


Real talk, you can sit on the sidelines with a scowl cause everyone around you is coupled up or you can grow and glow.


Let me know below what tips stood out for you!

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