• Tinukè Olatunbosun

Who Should Pay For The First Date?

In the dating world, the question of who should pay for the date is often discussed. I am sure many individuals  find the most awkward part of the date to be when the bill is given. Will the man pay or should the bill be split equally.

So who should pay for the date? My view on this topic depends on where in a relationship a couple might be. For instance the first date, do I believe the man should pay? Yes, not because it is stereotypically the norm but because 1) He should wine and dine his date as they are still at the getting to know each other stage. It shows how he sees and values her, you are in no way buying her interest, just showing her she’s worth getting treated. 2) He probably initiated the date. However a woman should always bring money on the date, you should never expect to be paid for. You don’t want to end up humiliated if you do have to pay your part of the bill and have no cash.


Moreover, a more interesting question is who should pay after the first date and further on in the relationship. The type of date and the occasion definitely plays a part. For example a birthday or celebrating a partners work promotion. In terms of the type of date, if you go to a location such as a bar, both individuals can take turns getting a round. This way both individuals are paying money towards the date. Another example is somewhere like the cinema, one person can pay for the film, whilst the other pays for the snacks. Whereas when taking a date out because you are proud of an achievement they may have gained, or a birthday, of course I believe that person should be paid for by their date. This is regardless of whether male or female and whatever stage you are at in your relationship. This is a special occasion.


To conclude, my personal opinion is that when a relationship is fully established although it sounds cliche , who ever suggest the date should pay. In regards to my relationship, if I ask my partner to dinner randomly I am expecting to pay as I suggested it. Although It may not always end up in me paying, I have asked with full intentions to take responsibility of the bill. Lastly, I do not believe that one person should pay for all the dates, it’s a partnership and both people in the relationship should contribute financially.

I would love to know your views on this topic, please comment below

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This is an advice section is for relationship based questions and dilemmas. 

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